Just Thinking Aloud...

I want to get rid of them... But I can't. They've become more than just a part of me. Now, I'm losing control. The anger, can it really grow this huge? The pain, can it really eat me whole? A lot of people tell me to let go. Really let go... Beyond the motives... Not just for a show... But how? I don't know where to start and how to go about. Everytime I try to move on, something keeps holding on. This is greater than a moster. It's like a haunting, restless spirit whose got monsterlike capabilities and gigantic powers. I am losing again. And I'm so confused. Isn't it true that we actually win when we accept defeat? Why don't I feel victorious? Over and over, I feel the pain. It doesn't subside. How I wish I haven't known these cruel people who keep putting me through these miseries. Is it possible? Can a phoenix rise from the ashes twice? Will I end up victorious? Do good guys always win in the end? I can't lose hope. I must stick to my faith. I will win against these monsters. I will win against these cruel people. Justice is always served to the selfish, thoughtless people. I can almost smell vistory. I can almost taste it!